keep believing

i love love the grand canyon of yellowstone, the mighty architecture by The Great Architect!

taken by fly.

… as i took in the scene, i realized my own littleness, my helplessness, my dread exposure to destruction, my inability to cope with or even comprehend the mighty architecture of nature.. – nathaniel p langford, 1870, on the canyon

thinking about my work here has made me realise how distorted i am. i give thanks when things are good for me, i complain when things are bad for me. i’m unhappy and i demand justice when i feel to be at loss due to unfairness. but i don’t mind injustice when i’m being favoured, which happens too many times, and i actually do enjoy it. my definitions of happiness and justice are indeed distorted and too relative.

some friends and i started work as dishwashers here (we have a facebook group called: we know what you ate last dinner, which fortunately is disfunctioned because all of us are no longer dishwashing!), while another bunch of friends who came with us, were lucky enough to be in the front of the house. we had to deal with scrubbers and chemicals and dirty dishes, while they deal with food and customers. of course, we compared, we complained. however, after a few days, three of us got promoted to the pantry, while the rest remained, and though sorry for them, i felt thankfully happy for myself.

and it doesn’t stop there. i’ve applied these distorted definitions to almost every other thing too, like the number of hours i clock in, the duties i have to do, the lessons i get to learn, the hikes/tours/trips i get to go to.. also, the grades that i got (my results came out yesterday)! happiness and justice according to my definitions depend on the situations i’m in. whether God is good or not depends on whether things are good for me or not?

well.

-

i got my paycheck a few days ago! i haven’t been spending much here, only spent on food at airports, postcards, detergents, some snacks.. and i bought a cheap pair of hiking/walking shoes today :) they will be useful here and when i go for exchange next year, i hope. i bought the shoes on my second circle of fire tour. canyon was still as grand, i still slept as much, but it was very much warmer today. overall it wasn’t as good as the first one though.

and we cleant and revamped our room :) as of now, it still looks neat and presentable, so people don’t go into the room and say: so messy!
fyi, my roommates are as messy as i am, and we have the same level of tolerance. so we get along well.

every good thing, and every bad thing that God turns for good, is a blood-bought gift. -john piper

i went for another hike a few days ago, to see the fairy falls which is very pretty and fairy-y with the two pieces of ice that fly thinks look like an angel’s wings. i think the drops of water themselves look fairy-y. we saw imperial geyser, busy erupting, and a busy mudpot too, i almost got a few people lost with me before we reached there! the three hours hike was fast-paced and thus very tiring, but i loved it. i wasn’t supposed to go for the hike because it was to start before i ended work. but i decided to go and planned things out on the last minute, and they worked out! so with a dabao-ed dinner, and a jacket and a beanie that fly brought for me, i got to go :) in my work uniform.
last minute decisions excite me, they are like surprises from myself.

i’ve been going walking by myself after work the past week. i’ve covered all the geysers up to the morning glory pool where i saw a bison carcass nearby. i don’t mean to boast but that is such a loser-ish achievement.
on one of these easy breezy walks, i looked for a quiet bench, and did my quiet time and read my book in the nature once. and i’d want to do that more often.

about the wildlife.. i’m getting aware that animals are named differently because they are different. like squirrels and chipmunks, wolves and foxes and coyotes, elks and mule deers. except for bison and american buffalo, same thing!
i haven’t seen any wild bear yet, i still hope to see one on my group hike/walk, but i still hope not to see any on my alone hike/walk.

thank God.
for every good thing and for every bad thing (turned/turning good).

meet my f.o.s. (full of shit) roommates. they are very funny people.

f.l.y.

and p.k.!

what’s with the initials.

we stay just opposite the ladies’ bathroom, in the brightest, merriest room :)

daisy, the geyser.
i saw her erupt during my easy breezy walk this evening.

Kupenuh sukacita,
Darah Yesus sucikan hatiku
Kasih Hu penuhiku
Roh Tuhan memimpin jalanku

Masyurkan Hu,
Pujilah Hu
S’bab anugrah Hu,
Besar ajaib
Masyurkan ke ujung bumi
Masyurkan sampai s’lamanya..

i sing this song all the time. when i scoop the ice. when i walk by myself. when i feel happy lalala..

the grand canyon of yellowstone

i remember posting this picture in this blog last year, and i saw the real thing yesterday! it really does look like this, except that it’s soooo much nicer and grander and wow-er and i was feeling very very cold. i went without any of my photographers (my roommates and erwin), so yup, no pictures this time.

basically i just had two consecutive off days, that’s why i got to go to west yellowstone two days ago, and i went to this circle of fire bus tour yesterday. didn’t feel very well in the morning, couldn’t even finish a piece of pancake for breakfast, was very fickle minded about the trip. but i went in the end, i’m glad i did.. it’s just too bad that i didn’t wear enough clothing, though the weather wasn’t that bad, but it was very cold! i was freezing the whole time in the bus, and even more so when we stopped to look around. lunch at canyon lodge made me feel so much warmer, and it’s one of the best meals i’ve had here.

we spent most of the time on the bus, and we had this guide who told us stories about yellowstone (she called them the chapters of the book of yellowstone).. bisons, fires in yellowstone, accidents, ravens, geysers and hot springs, some painters and photographers, elks, bears, waterfalls, etc etc.. it’s amazing how much she knows. the guests have to pay $58 for this tour, but of course, i didn’t ;) but again, i wasn’t that well, so i slept half of the time on the bus, missed one stop (an obstinacy of bison and their calves) and good sceneries and information from the guide (she talked non-stop on the bus!). i sure want to go for the tour again next time.

we saw a lot of bisons, we saw bisons crossing the road, we saw elks, pine trees, yellowstone lake, rivers.. and of course the grand canyon of yellowstone and the waterfalls, which made me feel so small and think how can anyone ever think that God doesn’t exist. we saw fountain paint pot which has a lot of geysers, and there’s this geyser which doesn’t stop erupting but i can’t remember its name. we went back to old faithful, and i watched its eruption once more :)

work work work.. i’m now called cold walker because i don’t run. but fly thinks we should call ourselves cool walker ;)

i went to west yellowstone in montana yesterday. i brought a personal photographer, so i have pictures!

sherly look, this sure beats your little nest.. an eagle’s nest. we saw this on our way there, the trip took 45 minutes.

montana, montanaa..

that’s a grizzly bear behind me. we went to bear and wolf reservation park or something like that. the bears and wolves were very lazy. it’s of course more exciting to see them in the wild instead of captivity. back in old faithful, there are three famous wild bears, two twins, and a large sized bear called the preacher. well but i hope i don’t see them when i’m exploring alone.

notice that i’m all cheeks?

nice view.. i smiled and posed so long, and the picture was taken only after i stopped posing.

(window) shopping! there were many cute little shops which sadly display about the same stuff, and two supermarkets.. it was not a very big town. from the whole trip, i only got myself a cheap torch light and glaceau vitamin water – focus which i bought because it’s pink and it says this:

not a lot of singers can rock, even fewer can roll. and once you throw pop in the mix, you can forget about it. but the multi-platinum kelly clarkson pulls off all three like a diner does breakfast, lunch, and dinner. most vocalists couldn’t even lip-sync to a set like hers. so, how does she do it? behind her hazel eyes is some serious focus. she’s living proof that with a little concentration you can do anything… catch a fly with chopsticks, solve a sudoku puzzle, or climb the corporate ladder. just stay off the top of the chart – that’s kelly’s territory.

vitamin + water = all you need

i did sudoku a few times before studying last semester to get me to focus! maybe i should try catching a fly with chopsticks next time..

pictures are courtesy of erwin

it was my off day yesterday, but it was snowing the whole day. i love snow, i love dancing in the snow and catching snowflakes with my gloves, i love how white the trees and houses and streets are right now.. sorry la, a bit never see snow before in my life.. but it’s too cold to stay outside for too long, so we have to stay indoor. i spent almost the entire day in the room, though i did accomplish a few things. like doing my laundry, sending half of the postcards that i have, writing a few more postcards, reading my book, catching up with people, having an international meeting (singapore-indonesia-usa) through msn because skype didn’t work, eating a little bit less in the day but spoiling it by eating soo much during our singaporean food party in the night (nissin cup nooddles and leftovers from the cafetaria with sambal blachan!)..

and i have to get ready for work now. i’m doing a lot of cold runner now. that is taking care of the desserts and salads stations, refilling and stocking up when necessary. it may seem slack and easy, but it’s a lot of walking here and there, and the trays are not exactly light! well hope this can help me losing that extra weight i’ve gained from all the food i eat here!

I received this article in my inbox this morning from a concerned sister. Well, I’m not exactly “dating” any bad boy right now, nor any good one, but I guess she knows me pretty well.

And yes, I think I’m a good girl.

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